lunes, junio 23, 2008

Mil respuestas ... una correcta...CHOCLO

Dios ha muerto, el Choclo lo mató. -Nietzsche
Dos cosas son infinitas: el universo y el choclo; y yo no estoy seguro sobre el primero. -Einstein
Lo que sabemos es una gota de agua; lo que ignoramos es el choclo. -Isaac Newton

Daría todo lo que sé, por la mitad de un choclo. - Rene Descartes
Estas son las verdaderas frases extraídas del evangelio gnóstico perdido de Pancho Melo, no acepte imitaciones.

Extracto del ensayo hecho por Augusto recabarrenen 1865 en el congreso internacional de teología y TICs de la universidad Roberto Dueñas celebrado en Tenochtitlán.

Desde que la humanidad es humanidad, se han buscado respuestas a su soledad cosmológica y una forma de evitar la angustia al hecho de darse cuenta que que las propias limitaciones de la razón y el entendimiento nos imposibilitian ver mas allá de nuestra cotidianidad y escapar del tiempo y el espacio eternamente cambiantes. La primera respuesta, la mas sencilla fue decir, "puta porque así es la wea!", la cual fue dicha por "UGO", el primer filósofo prehistorico (conocido tambien por ser el primero en rallar bufalos y mamuts con enormes penes en sus pinturas rupestres). La respuesta de UGO, no muy elaborada (pero suficientemente bien pensada para sacarse un 55) fue la base de la cosmología y la moral de estas primitivas sociedades, hasta el momento en que surgió la necesidad de enterrar a los muertos (el olor de la abuelita tirada por ahi no es muy agradable porque "así es la wea" ). Ahí el hombre de neanderdetal, al rendirle culto a los muertos, empezó a creer e los espíritus, el chamanismo,y esas hierbas, evolucionando hasta llegar a la 2º respuesta mas fácil a esta prueba de la existencia ... DIOS... bueno, Dioses en realidad, pero la idea es la misma, ahora la respuesta de UGO se actualiza por el "Dios quizo así la wea", lo que conlleva a que todo lo creado por dios es bueno, y todo lo impuesto por dios tambien es bueno, por lo que hay una buena forma de comportarse social y moralmente y eso lleva a la tranqulidad (eehhh ahora te sacaste un 60 =D!!). Y aún no termina esto, si combinas al dios del sol, al del agua, al del infierno, al de la guerra, al de la silla, al de la caca por uno solo (llamemosle LLavé, Halá, Brama, Crichna, etc), ahora tienes un 65 =D!!.
"Oh, chucha, creo que respondí mal...eso me pasa por ser tan mecánico pa responder las weas, ctm, chucha, parece que no es así la wea", bueno, la respuesta fue mecánica, el hombre se empieza a cuestionar a Dios y sus amigos, (acá se puede invocar el nombre de todos esos filosofos partiendo por nirche, marx, y cosas así).
La muerte de la razón despues de la segunda guerra mundial, llevó al surgimiento de la postmodernidad y juegos de video como call of duty medal of honor y commandos.
Bueno, al grano, con esa duda de la fé en dios y en la razón, y un buen chamullo, ya tienes un 75 =D!!.
Pero bueno, queremos un 100, se requiere de una respuesta con mayor preparación, aquí es donde aparece el choclo. Con el choclo, la ciencia y los mitos convergen, se busca el equilibrio entre la tendencia a las suprarrealidades perfectas y la aceptación de la vida y la creación de nuevos valores. Bueno, la cosa parte con ".........." (la idea era demasiado complicada y nadie entendió, luego se quedaron dormidos, incluyendo el taquígrafo, imagínese una clase de fundamentos de informatica con horst von brand)
Finalmente llegamos a la ecuación fundamental del unvierso sintetizando teorías de la física cuántica y la filosofía contemporáneaCon esto, por 2 axiomas fundamentales, se puede hacer una reducción al absurdo de Dios, conviertiendolo en un ñandú

Así que la razón, de todo, la expliación de todo, el orígen de todo, la causa de todo, la forma del todo, el origen de la moral, de la razón, de la vida, del devenir, de la eternidad, el alfa y el omega es sencillamente .....CHOCLO!!!

Luego de que la conferencia terminara con una increíble ovación del público, un equipo de hombrers disfrazados de pollo SWAT del vaticano irrumpieron en la sala y censuraron este escrito por años.

Choclo!!!

Algunas de las miles de aplicaciones reales del esta verdad universal:
1)
-"¿Oe wn, cachai la respuesta de la 5?"
-"Si, choclo"
- "ooohh wn cierto!" (con esa respuesta tu interlocutor dudará de su continuidad en sus estudios)
2)
La clase está aburrida en inentendible, levantas la mano y le dices al profesor "choclo!!", el profesor sorprendido dice "oooh choclo", todos tus compañeros gritarán golpeando la mesa "CHOCLO CHOCLO CHOCLO!!!"
3)
-"Wn, me dejó mi mina, por un negro etiope sacamanteca"
- "Loco, dile choclo"
(A la semana se casarán, tendrán hijos y morirán en una tumba juntos)
4)
Si no sabes nada en una prueba simplemente pon choclo en todas las respuestas, hay un 99,9999% de probabilidad de tener nota máxima.
5)
-"¿Oe wn, Dios existe?"
-"Choclo"
(no hay que agregar mas expliaciones)

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xD hahahahh

*comienza a golpear la mesa*
CHOCLO CHOCLO CHOCLO!!

sobre lo de la pba ..si hay algo q no cacho
ya sabre q poner..
CHOCLO

xD mas te vale q ese 0.0001% no aparezca XD o lo lamentaras

y cuando vaya a matarte ..te dire antes :..

CHOcho ^___^ y tu
"aaaaa choclo ..dale! D:"


XD nos vemos pablo! cuidate el choclo! wenisimo articulo!! XD *riendo xD*

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Pondre choclo para x lo menos salvarme del apocalipsis que vendra
Y si no rsulta
te podi entubar el choclo
xD...

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